About Nilüfer.

A bit about me

I became a therapist because of the people who once made space for me — patient, curious, unhurried. I try to offer the same: a room where what’s heavy gets a little lighter, and where you don’t have to be anyone other than who you are.

Before this work, I spent years moving between countries and languages. I notice the small ways that shapes a life — the parts of ourselves we leave at borders, the parts that come with us anyway. I bring that attention to my clients.

My training

I hold a Master’s in Marriage and Family Therapy from San Diego State University, where I trained in systemic, attachment-informed work with couples and individuals. I’m a Licensed Marriage and Family Therapist Associate (LMFTA) in Washington, supervised by a state-approved clinical supervisor.

I draw on Emotionally Focused Therapy (EFT), Internal Family Systems (IFS), and relational psychodynamic thinking. In practice that means: I’m more interested in the patterns underneath than the surface symptoms, and I trust the relationship between us to do real work.

How I think about therapy

Therapy is not, to me, a tool you take out and use. It’s a relationship inside which something becomes possible. I take the work seriously and the people in it more seriously.

I’m collaborative. I’ll tell you what I’m noticing and ask what you’re noticing. I won’t pretend to know what you need before you do. When I do have a hunch, I’ll offer it — gently — and we’ll look at it together.

Outside the room

I live in Seattle with my partner and a small, opinionated cat. I read more poetry than is strictly reasonable, walk in the Arboretum in every weather, and make Turkish coffee with too much care. I am very slowly learning to garden.